Passion 2013

A few weeks ago, I was able to go home and spend the weekend with my family. Thank the Lord, because He knew I would need it. He knew that even though I claim to be "grown up" now- I would need my mom to hold my hair back as I threw up the nerves and heartache, I would need Dad's hugs, and my brother's silly laughter during a time of pain in my life. I awoke Sunday morning, my entire body ached. I had already lost 8 pounds that week (some girls gorge their stomachs with Ben&Jerry chocolate icecream, but not me) and I was feeling incredibly weary. I was at lost as to what to do, and I was pretty certain this must be what death felt like. I got on youtube, and meant to type "Our God" but somehow I ended up typing "How Great is Our God" and clicking on a video I didn't even want to watch...But, the moment it began, a crowd of 45,000 college students is shown- arms raised and praising the Lord...the song was being sung in multiple languages, and a slideshow at the event depicted barefoot children standing in trash piles, Indians bicycling through the bustling city of Mumbai, African children running through the bush, and hurting people of all nations.


...While watching the video, my worries began to fade away...my pain of this world didn't matter...I was watching with my own eyes what God has called me to do. The song, the video, the collaboration of slides shown, it hit home. It hit my hurting heart...and my heart began crying out, "See! This is what I was made for!" Suddenly, I felt peace, the peace was so reassuring that I began sobbing...is this what it takes for God to bring me to the plans He has had all along for me? Does it take an aching, broken heart to know the pain of this world in order to minister to others? Does it take bringing me to my absolute lowest point in order to bring me to my highest point? God has allowed me to be brought to ground-zero, my face flat on the ground, choking on the dirt, and my body suffering from the fall. I know, though, without a shadow of a doubt- God will make beautiful things out of this brokenness...God is making me new, He is refining me...He's getting rid of the junk and replacing it with His fruits. It is painful. It is worth it.
P.S.- My suitemate, a friend from high school, and I will all be roadtrippin' it down to Passion 2013 this January! All because I stumbled across that video. I encourage anybody who hasn't watched it yet, to watch it. It is so powerful... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyGD3zH9Xvc&feature=related