I AM SO EXHAUSTED

The other night was 80's skate night at my college...I was all excited, until I felt that all my friends had "forgotten" about me. I guess it was just the little straw that broke the camel's back..I hadn't cried in a few days, thinking that maybe I was getting stronger. But, I lost it. I realized how utterly lonely I am. I am sad. I am grieving. I am so very EXHAUSTED. I want a quit button! This is not easy!
Can I just say it? I MISS MY BEST FRIEND.  Life with him made perfect sense. I miss him, God, I MISS HIM! 
I am tired of these nightmares. Crying out in the middle of the night, tossing and turning, by the time the morning light pours through my blinds, I am exhausted already. Every night is a battle. Every day is a struggle. Dreams of snakes slithering around my ankles, drowning in dark waters, and seeing backs turning on me- I can't take it anymore. Lord, take it. Fill my nights with peace, I beg You! 
Anyways, I am just so tired. How much longer can I run this race?
But, just when I feel like I just can't go on...God provides. This time, he provided a loving letter from a girl living on my hall. I don't know her well, we don't talk, and she doesn't know what I'm going through. So, as I lay down to go to sleep, after sobbing to my mom on the phone, my roommate walks in and said there was a letter underneath the door. "Dear Kate, I can't explain why, but ever since we arrived here at college, I can't you off my mind...I really feel that God has placed you on my heart to be praying for you..." This brought me to tears. God does remember me...and He reminded me by using a girl on my hall. Thank you, Jesus! It was as if He gave me a little cup of water just when I beginning to dehydrate...it's not much, but it will keep me running the next few yards. I have to continually remind myself- God knows what He's doing. He sees it all. It's so hard to remember, but I keep pressing on...keeping the faith that I will run and not grow weary, I will walk and not be faint...because my hope is in the Lord!
P.S.- God did send a friend to knock on my door as I cried to my mom that no one remembered me. She also needed someone to go with her to the party. Another provision from the Lord.